Simplify, Motherfuckers!

As usual, the government is more worried about pansy-ass social programs like education, health care, and NPR.

Who really needs education? Nobody, that’s who! Who’s cares about healthcare? Whiny liberals! And who wants to hear Ira Glass being all sensitive to Americans’ pain? Whiny liberal nobodies!

And as we speak, the Axis of Dharma is arming itself for a war against Western values. They’re planning to transcend the shit out of everything Americans hold dear. They’re going to meditate in the Mall of America! Have tantric sex in church! They might even refuse to accept the artificial good vs evil duality so persistent in American culture. 

I’m telling you, the buddhists must be stopped!