December 2010
6 posts
Anonymous asked: sex with furniture. what are your thoughts?
homelessinportland asked: Camelus,
This is Will is Homeless in Portland. I just want to say that I found your last post to be very funny. How can you be so funny without using the word "buttocks"?
I'm glad your staff of scientists is working on a cure for camel flu. We at Will is Homeless in Portland are working on a cure for camel toe. Love and happy holidays.
This is Will is Homeless in Portland. I just want to say that I found your last post to be very funny. How can you be so funny without using the word "buttocks"?
I'm glad your staff of scientists is working on a cure for camel flu. We at Will is Homeless in Portland are working on a cure for camel toe. Love and happy holidays.
3 tags
Sex Help Hotline →
If these people are a sex hotline, then I’m the motherfucking King of Lichtenstein, a social media mogul (send your venture capital to my alter ego) a Michelin-rated 5-star chef, and the biggest dick since John Holmes hit the big screen. Fucking please. And if that wasn’t enough, they appear to have taken a good tumblr theme and turned it into some shitty-looking abomination...
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2011: Sincerity Replaces Irony
This coming year, my crystal ball is telling me that vapid hipsters will finally give up on irony. They’ll realize they’ve spent most of their lives saying “Yeah, I like, really LOVE you” when actually they mean to say “Your vaginal odor disgusts me.”
They’ll look into their closets full of mid-80s Little League baseball uniforms and church camp t-shirts...
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Minimalist Predictions for 2011: Pussies will...
For this New Year’s prediction I’m going way out there. As I gaze into my crystal ball this clear Saharan morning, I can clearly see…
Lots of people panicking for no reason! Maybe they think they have a reason, like the Icelandic volcano Eyjafjallajökull, maybe it’s the threat of the new Camel Flu that’s sweeping Morocco, killing dozens. Maybe it’s the fact...
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Minimalist Predictions for 2011: Ask a Bactrian...
Many of you may be wondering what the future holds in store for you. In these trying times of adversity and uncertainty, it’s comforting to have old Camelus here to tell you what’s shakin’. In this series I will do my camelish best, squinting into my crystal ball, to let everybody know. And so with no further ado…
My First Prediction for 2011
With real unemployment...
